A lot of your issues come from using a Google phone (Nexus/Pixel) rather than a different brand such as Samsung. Samsung can do external display mirror over USB, or let you use your external USB monitor as a second display (wirelessly too). It has no messaging bullshit.
That said I have a Fold 4. iPhone aren't doing folding phones atm and they lock down the ecosystem so much I have zero interest.
Exactly my thoughts. The OP just seemed like they want an iPhone because they like it, not because of the excuses they posted. They are all solvable by simply picking a phone from another brand (except maybe for the messaging thing, I didn't quite understand that one).
That said I have a Fold 4. iPhone aren't doing folding phones atm and they lock down the ecosystem so much I have zero interest.