In my experience (I've opted-out 6 times now in the past 1.5 years), they let you take your baggage with you to the pat down area, and you never have to lose eye contact.
I was at JFK Terminal 1 (International) and I got separated from my bags on the belt for an extended period of time. When I complained that my bags were at risk of being stolen or lost, the TSA agent said "You opted out. That's what happens."
Needless to say, I found a supervisor and complained. I'm also filing an official complaint. I have no problem being patted-down but I do have a problem with them trying to coerce me to do something I've expressly asked to be excluded from, and using my fear of property loss to get me to do it. That's WRONG.
I've done it a few times now, and they have always had me identify my bag, shoes, etc on the belt before the pat down. Then they set the bags aside. They also insist that you don't touch it until you are finished with the patdown.
